psa: strength.

I have to be strong because of who depends on it. I have to be the example. I must pull through, and not just barely survive, but thrive and live well.

The differing standards aren't fair, but this is what it has come to. This is who I have been, who I am, and who I will always be. The one that will be there when you need her, even if she wants nothing to do with it. You get your advice and your model. Because on the outward I am even and smooth, with a vague sense of reality, a taste of normality.

I am breaking inside, but thank God for an outer layer. Because I'll confess, I never changed the rules back. They are still bent and broken, a disarray of my life, from the last time you swept through the shattered remnants.

Please be here when I wake.